This has been a pretty routine practice in America for ...hmmm... a little less than 100 years. (Check out the history... really interesting). It's normal, right? Well.. times are a changin'! The latest reported statistics from the CDC show that 67.5% of baby boys in America are now left intact.
Before I get into all of our reasons we have decided against circumcision, let me tell you a little about our journey.
With our first baby, husband and I talked very briefly about it. We decided that if we had a boy, we would circumcise. It was "normal" to us, and we had heard things about cleanliness and health as reasons to do it. We didn't want our son to be potentially made fun of in the locker room, etc. I also thought that if God had commanded the Jews to circumcise, there had to have been some good reason, right? We found out around 18 weeks into the pregnancy that we were having a girl, so we left it at that. We didn't do any research because it was unnecessary. Our midwife asked us if we would (with no judgement) and we said that we would but we were having a girl.. making it a non point.
Once we became pregnant the second time, I decided that I (we) should begin our research early. Really delve into the facts and find out how we really would feel given the available information. I read and read and read. I shared the important stuff with husband. And I guess what they say is true... the more you know - the more you are against it. Over a couple of months time, before we found out we were having a boy, we knew we were completely, absolutely, decidedly, definitely, unquestionably never ever ever ever ever going to do it to our child.
- After learning that there is no medical indication for it (doesn't reduce infection, little to no effect on STD's, etc.), along with the fact that no medical organization in the entire world recommends routine infant circumcision, along with the fact that it is being done less and less in our country -- With no BENEFIT (quite the OPPOSITE) to putting my brand new, perfect little baby through pain of surgery - cutting a part off of his perfectly formed little body, I just couldn't imagine, couldn't fathom!, putting my baby through it. With all of the statistics showing no benefit, many insurance companies have deemed it what it really is (and therefore many companies no longer cover it) - an elective cosmetic surgery.
- In addition to there being no medical benefit to circumcision, there are many risks involved, as there is with any surgery. Hemorrhage, infection and death are some immediate risks; there can also be ongoing and permanent complications. Death from circumcision may be one of the most common causes of death in babies, sadly it often goes unreported or is covered up. (Edited to add: It's estimated that as many boys die from infant circumcision as SIDS every year... SIDS is not always preventable - that we are yet aware of - but circumcision deaths are 100% preventable).
Ugh... this topic is so big and I have so much to say about what I have learned, it's really overwhelming to write this.... - The basics of the procedure: The prepuce (foreskin) of the penis is fused to the glans (head of the penis) at birth, much like your fingernail is fused to your finger. The skin eventually releases when the boy is older, 50% don't until 10 years old or later. In order to perform the circumcision, the skin must be torn apart. Forget the cutting - this has GOT to be the most painful part of the procedure (especially considering the millions of nerve endings in this sensitive part of the body!). This is something I didn't know about until researching. There are different ways of completing the circumcision once the skin has been torn apart, I won't go into that, but you can google the procedures if you like. I'm sure they are likely equally painful (although we'll never really know since our babies are too little to communicate). And remember, little to no anesthesia is used as it is too dangerous to use with a baby.
- I have heard so many times - "do it when they are little so they won't remember the pain." Whether this is true or not (that they don't remember pain)... I just don't understand how this makes it okay?? They are brand new and have experienced little to no pain in their short lives. Some reports even say that their nervous systems are HYPER aware in the beginning. To me, the fact that they can't tell you it hurts and you can't give them any pain relievers makes the whole thing so much more awful! Poor babies...
- "It's cleaner and / or easier to care for": Before the foreskin retracts on it's own, there is nothing different to be done. You never never never forcibly retract a foreskin. Only clean what is seen. This requires no more effort - and definitely less than a newly circumcised penis. (Check out FAQ's about care). Once the foreskin retracts, the parent shows the boy how to pull it up in the shower and let the water run over it. This is maybe different in mechanics, but little girls need to know how to clean themselves as well. And if a we are cutting little boys to be "cleaner" we should cut little girls labia off too - it would be cleaner! And they would be less prone to UTI's (girls are much more prone to infections than boys). We would never fathom cutting our little girls in the name of cleanliness. Or removing their mammary glands so they might avoid cancer in the future. Our boys deserve the same respect.
- "We want him to look like daddy" - First of all, if daddy had a missing arm, you wouldn't cut off your baby's arm so he "looked like daddy" would you? Of course not! I have never heard of any men/boys comparing genitals with their father/sons. As women, we don't compare breasts or labia with our daughters. Yes, it is a possibility (maybe even an eventuality) that our uncircumcised boy will ask why he looks different. We will explain to him, just as we would if daddy had a missing arm (age appropriately of course). The same would go for brothers (if one were intact and the other was not). If my mom had a mastectomy, I would probably have asked about that, but never wished my breast away so I could look like her.
- As far as biblical circumcision - it was a much different procedure than what is done today."It's true circumcision was a sign of the covenant God made with Abraham, but today's procedure is not the same procedure! In Abraham's day only enough of the foreskin was removed to expose the tip of the glans (or, the 'head'). The Maccabees, during their famous revolt against the Greek domination of the Jews, changed it to the procedure known today and forced it on all Jewish men on pain of death. In the New Testament, the Apostles announced (Acts chapter fifteen) that the ordinances of the Law of Moses were no longer required."It was a blood sacrifice. There was a little nick to the boys penis and a drop of blood was taken. That was it. Anything more and boys of that day probably would have been dying left and right from blood loss and infection. The reason why it is unnecessary for us to do this now as a Christian is the same reason we don't sacrifice lambs as burnt offerings, etc. - Jesus was the final and ultimate sacrifice. We are no longer under the law, we are under the blood of Christ.
Ok - this is getting long, so I'm just going to post some links regarding some other things and let you do the research if you feel led.
The prepuce/foreskin has a purpose! It's not just a useless piece of skin.
Are you Informed? Short article and lots of good resources (books, websites and articles)
**For mature audiences only** - entertaining and informative, but terrible language and graphic video - Penn and Teller Bullsh!t on Circumcision (Hubs and I watched this together - partially covering our eyes. Great overview on the topic if you aren't into reading).
If he chooses, my son will be able to make the decision himself someday whether he wants to remain intact or become circumcised. Until he makes that (fully informed) decision and knowingly consents to the surgery, I will not be cutting anything (unnecessarily) off of his body. It's his body and his choice, not one for me to make.
Circumcision goes against every mama bear instinct in me. I want to protect my child. To keep them whole. Unhurt. As perfect as the Lord created them to be within my womb. Some things are obviously out of my control - but circumcision is not. The prepuce has a purpose, God created it and I'll leave my son just as he was made. Whole.
Respectfully,
S
PS - I know many mom's that have made the decision to circumcise their son(s) (**I have no judgement!**) My best friend did and has since learned more about it and has decided, like many other women, that they no longer agree with it. While this must be a really difficult realization, we have to also realize that we do the best we can with the information we have. This is one reason I wanted to write this - to get information out there that is rarely if ever talked about. Whether or not you see circumcision as a "mistake" - we will all make some mistakes in parenting. None of us are perfect, nor will we ever be. We have to allow ourselves grace and room to grow and learn and become better people and better parents.
"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better." - Maya Angelou
(If you click on some of the links, you will see the same blog over and over many times. This woman has a wealth of knowledge and has done years of research. She lists sources and I personally think she has provided a great resource for inquiring parents. Of course this information is available elsewhere - I just have found her very honest, readable and well cited.)
