How to feed your baby?

This topic has been on my heart lately. I have recently heard several stories of mother's who have struggled with the "right" way to feed their babies and have given up because it just wasn't "working".

Although I can't speak from personal experience since I've never given birth in a hospital, it seems as though nurses/doctors/lactation consultants hand out very specific advice on how to feed your baby. Sometimes this includes with how long and how often. (By the way - most of these people have extremely little training or experience in breastfeeding - they are just passing along the little information they've been told. They are in no way experts in breastfeeding. Want a more experienced/expert opinion? Contact your local Le Leche League).

I don't understand why there are so many "rules" given to new moms. Let's just think of ourselves for a moment. Do most of us eat the same amount of calories at the same intervals every single day? Aren't we more hungry some days than others perhaps because of extra activity or a growth spurt when we were growing up? Some days we just need some extra snacks and calories for no apparent reason. And then you add to it that some people have much faster metabolisms than others. I think babies are probably much the same way. Some need more milk than others, some are more efficient eaters than others and will nurse for shorter periods of time, some are not as efficient and need to nurse longer. How does any hard and fast "feeding schedule" apply to every infant out there?

In addition to this, nursing your baby on demand is how you establish your milk supply! Allowing the baby to nurse as often as needed is how you build your milk supply and tell your body how much milk is needed. It's supply and demand. The more baby nurses, the more milk is made. The less your baby nurses, less milk is made. So if you try to put your baby on a schedule to fast too soon (or at all), you may hurt your milk supply. So these "lactation consultants" are setting mama's up for failure. Feeding on a schedule, especially in the beginning can lead to lower milk supply. Which leads to supplementing with formula. Once you start supplementing with formula it is a slippery slope and very hard to get out of, many times leading to the end of the nursing relationship.

Breastmilk is very easily digested by our babies. They are able to digest it within 2 hours. So it makes sense that a baby would need to eat at least every two hours. And maybe more often depending on the baby. Some babies will eat an entire meal in one session. Some babies will be "snackers" and eat several times in shorter intervals. A 3-4 hour schedule MAY work for the first baby, but the second baby would be very unhappy with this type of schedule.

Babies depend on us to provide everything they need. Especially while they are little, they (usually) need so little. They need milk, sleep, clean diapers and to be held. It is so sad to me that mother's are encouraged to ignore some of these needs. Why would we deprive our babies food when they are hungry? So they fit in a schedule? Babies will very rarely overeat. They will usually only eat the amount they need (especially breastfed babies).  It doesn't make sense to me to deprive a baby of such a simple need. They are growing in every way so fast every day! They need the nourishment!

NO ONE will ever know your baby better than you. NO ONE. EVER. Listen to your babies cues. Forget about what the books say or what your nurse told you is "normal" or "best". Every baby is different and has different needs. A mother knows best. ALWAYS. Feeding on demand at the very least for the first 3-4 months of life is so very important. Only your baby knows when he/she is hungry. They are not "manipulating" you. You do not need to "control" them.

No one ever told me how to feed my baby. I just put my baby to my breast and we figured it out together. My babies have thrived. No schedules. They just eat when they are hungry. My youngest is more of a snacker than my first was. He eats much more often but in short little bits sometimes. Sometimes he will go longer stretches. I just listen to his cues. I couldn't tell you how many times per day or how long on average he eats. I have no clue. He is healthy and chubby and a happy baby - much better indicators than any numbers could tell you.

xoxo
S